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Wednesday, October 26, 2005
i hate complications..
11:25 PM
hhhaaayyy..*sigh* *sigh* *sigh*
at tripleng buntung hininga po yan..y?bket?ngano?..xe for the past 2 weeks,my life has turned from the seemingly okay to the definitely confused and agitated..y again,you ask?
well,it's lyk this..
last october 19,i've already sed yes to tungsten..because i felt like it really was the best tym i'd say yes..nd besyds,i wouldn't let the guy who taught me how to move on just pass me by..
i didn't know i'd be confused this way.. *sigh*
october 22 came..it was my brother's school minifair..we (my mom, my brother, nd i) had to go because there was the bingo thing nd a lot of my friends were invyting me to come,even kevin (whom you all know)..nd so we did..der,i met up with my friends..i even separated from my brother nd mom just so i could spend quality tym wid my friends..i miss them na xe,kya un..wat i didn't expect was kevin meant *business* wen he invyted me der..
nd so,wen we (kevin nd i) met up,we talked..i was xpecting a friendly conversation..you know, *just* a friendly conversation..the type wer you talk about how u've been,what's new,etc..
nd so i told him i was already committed..i thot he'd be happy..now,im starting to believe that you rili have to xpect the unxpected at tyms..
the nyt after the fair,kevin txtd me nd i learned that he rili wasn't gay nd he's been planning on courting me..he wanted to start nga daw nung minifair..xo,i was already committed..it caught me by surprise xe i wasn't xpecting him to react that way..nd den i asked him d questions i've been longing to hear the answers..
~y play the gay game?? = a cover-up..~y only now? = he was prioritizing his studies..because in his school,the 1st semester is the backbone of your grades..if you fail or got low grades in the 1st sem,you're rili bound to fail..nd he promised his mom dat he'd get good grades for her, and his dad nd grandmom..~wat are you planning to do? = he plans to wait..his exact words were: "nkapagantay ako ng 16 years para sa moment na makita ko ang babaeng mahal ko..another 16 years?kya ko pa un.."~y didn't you respond to all my messages nd email?khet ung mga pnpsbe ko lang ke joyance? = he prioritized nga daw his studies..khet sobwang sket nga daw na nde cya mkapagrespond,tniis pden nia..xe he needed to focus on one thing -- his studies..
after that,i told him i've already moved on..nd there was no way i was going back..i also told him na it was tym he'd move on too..xe nga lam ko ang hrap nd pagmomove on nd if he didn't start now,he'd find it harder nd harder each day..cnabe ko nga den na wen God takes away,He replaces it something so much better..pwo he sed he didn't someone else,evn tho she's better than me..nd so,i tryd convincing him some more..but it seemed like my efforts of persuading him won't make him budge..
tas nung monday nyt,joyance called me..she told me na she saw kevin that morning tas nga his eyes were all puffy nd red from all the crying..joyance asked him wat was wrong..nd then kevin told her na he'll tell her the whole story pagka 7 that nyt..
nd so dey talked..but i won't be including it here..since mejo ung summary andun na sa taas..i just left out some details..
at tsaka,ang mhalaga lang na tnung dun na cnabe ni kevin:
'masaya ka ba??'
cnabe ko nman..oo..msaya ko..inaamin ko nde ko ganun ksaya (xe we're still working things out) pwo msaya ko..
hhhaaayyy..*sigh* *sigh* *sigh*
sna nde nlang gento ka-complicated ang lyf ko..kung may advice nman po kau..i rili nid it..
please..
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
ui,c superman o..
6:38 AM
superman = tungsten_13.. hehe..., |
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